Sssshhhhhh .

“Each one of us has a unique gift. In some, it is speech; in some silence.”

I came across this line yet again, when I was reading “Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul-II” yet again (that is because the last time I read it I was in ninth standard and I hardly remember a word I had read then). Beautiful lines, indeed.

The first rule of a happy life is to know and to realize that every element has a complementary element. Having known that, it becomes hell easier to see the good and positive in a lot of things. Not always maybe, but often. Someone asked me yesterday if I am the “silent-types”. And I was actually wondering what to tell if I was expected to answer in a ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Thankfully, he has an extremely patient ear and I was allowed to give a more elaborate answer.

Basically, I generally tend to form opinions about myself on the basis of what people tell me about myself. Not always maybe, but often. A little self analysis doesn’t hurt anyways!
>> Well, the people who are simply acquaintances for me come up to me a lot of times and tell me to talk a little more, often complaining I remain too silent.
>> Those who are close friends tell me a million times in a day that I go on and on and on.
>> My roomie tells me to shut up a lot of times in a day :P, and I appreciate her for that :P.
>> My closest friend ‘Aditi’ told me once that I listen patiently and say just the right thing, without overdoing or under-doing the talking (though she told me to forget this instantly so as to prevent me from getting on the ninth cloud :P).
>> At home, almost everyone gets fed up of my comic acts and ‘stupid blabber’ (in one of my close friend’s words :P).

Putting the pieces together trying to get a bigger picture, I identify myself as an awkward combination of an introvert and an extrovert, a shy and a gullible person. But isn’t that what we all are most of the times? Never black, never white. But all shades of grey. . .

I guess when you are entering a new arena, it is important to be a little gullible. But as your relationship grows, it becomes almost mandatory to inculcate the virtue of ‘silence’ in oneself. Isn’t that what we crave for the most- A patient, loving and understanding ear? And then there are other times, when you really need someone who can go on and on and on so you can just sit there listening. It is so beautiful to find how complementary values are an inevitable part and parcel of almost everything. :-?

I am not really sure if I am completely the silent-types, considering the number of hours I talk to mum on the phone :P, but I’d happily prefer calling myself the ‘silent-types’ :)

--- Yours FOREVER ---

“I am yours Forever.”
“You are all mine.”
“All I need in life is –YOU.”

These and many such similar phrases unknowingly instill a lot of happiness in a lot of people. Strange though it may sound, they would just implant doubt, disbelief and suspicion in me. :-?

When Sir told us in class : “If someone tells you, “I love you” , it is still believable. But if someone comes up to you and tells you, “I only love you”, tell yourself there is something seriously wrong and unbelievable cooking up.” ; I was more than overwhelmed :P. Not because noone has ever come up and told me that :P :)). But because I have always had this notion. How unbelievable it is to even imagine a person belonging to just YOU, no matter how common it seems to have become in today’s life!

I confess, I have never been in a relationship. But I wonder, even if I was, in the-so-called love with someone, would it cancel and nullify all the other people in my life, and would I then belong to just one person on earth :-/; as they say, and I only dare quote, “I am all Yours, Forever”.

And Ouch! That last word pinched!
And here sprouts the bigger question! How long a duration does a “Forever” signify? Now please don’t tell me a ‘Forever’ means a ‘Forever’! Ofcourse it doesn’t :-??

The point I am trying to make here is that it is practically unfeasible to have just one person in your life and spend your entire life with that one person- Truly, madly, deeply! And if that is taken, wouldn’t it imply that it should be acceptable and rather more probable to be in love with more than one person at the same time for a longer time, than being in a short-lived romantic relationship with one person? And isn’t our heart filled with uncountable, infinite love? And isn’t it enough to be bestowed upon not just one privileged one? And doesn’t that make people who are in-love-with-just-one-person look seemingly selfish?

No no! I am not promoting, or for that matter, even supporting infidelity. What I mean to put forward is simply that why does romantic love for one person make us so self-centered! Wasn’t love supposed to be all goody-goody? Wasn’t it supposed to be all about giving? Wasn’t love supposed to be infinite- so much that it would always be good enough to be given away? Then why do almost all people I know suddenly seem to have undergone a transformation after they have been said to be in love?

Not convinced? I am not sure if even I am.:P

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I am back in hostel after screwing my dead head with this shopping thing! I am almost satisfied with the amount of money I have spent (I am not really a miser. I just like spending a little money and saving lots of money :P). I’d prefer confirming if my shopping is good enough or not from a friend who has a nice choice and gives a critical view of the stuff. My roomie is just the perfect person for this! If it’s good, it’s good! If it isn’t, she’ll tell me “Better luck, next time: P”. But I guess she should be busy on the phone right now. I’d better go and take suggestions from someone else. Maybe a little less efficient at it, but a little more willing at least!
You think I should check on my roomie first?
Well, I doubt if you’d understand how my intuitions are almost always correct. But, I’d try explaining.
Let’s put it this way, then.

Just find a friend who is showing those stupid symptoms of being-in-love (those of the kinds-talking about the same person, finding everything right about the person, having no problems at all to go out of their way just to bring a smile on that one person’s face, etc. etc. etc.). And then (iff your friend is in the category of people I am talking about), you are expected to find the following events taking place around you:

1. The person (say A) bugs you like hell talking about that person (say B).
2. A spends so much time with B that you wonder if she is still sane.
3. Everything (read: EVERYTHING) B does, is the perfect thing for A.
4. They might fight continuously for hours, but they would still be the only ones for each other.
5. A suddenly realizes that she has no time left for anything else in this world other than for B.
6. You get to hear of A’s friends less often.
7. A starts looking really busy now.
8. You get to hear of A’s friends even less often.
9. A can be found feeling completely lost and lonely in a crowd (read: group)of as many as 20 people (read: friends).
10. You get to hear of A’s friends even less often.
11. A begins to assume B will not eat, drink, sleep if it wasn’t A reminding B, or vice-versa.
12. A’s friends cease to exist.
13. A and B are as good as happily (not really sure about this part :P) married.
14. It seems, A’s world would have been a vacuum if it weren’t for B.
15. Well, forget it! It can go on till eternity!

And ya, if it’s A’s birthday! You are insane to even think you had the right to give birthday wishes at 12! Ofcourse that right is solely and completely reserved by B!

Sorry if you find that too biased (I bet you are either A or B; anything but me :P).
That’s what “love” is like, most of the time! I don’t have a problem with the love they are sharing together. It should be an awesome feeling :-?
But how unknowingly they keep kicking out people, one after the other, is indeed a pity! Isn’t love for one and for all? Shouldn’t it spread happiness and more love in the surrounding? Shouldn’t it retain its own privacy, at the same time making other people feel loved too? Doesn’t everyone deserve to be loved anyways? :-??

I wonder if all this is justifiable :-?
I wonder if my definition of love is just a fairy-tale version of the real, practical thing :-?
Maybe I am acting too stern towards people who are in love, just because I am not :-/
Maybe I am just assuming things that never are. :-/



I decide to share my shopping experience with my roommate. I pick up my new pair of blue jeans, and the black shoes that I had found hiding behind a not-so-good-looking pair of chappals after so much hard work; and progress towards my room-mate. :)

I call out, “Hey, look! I went shoppinnnnggg!” :D

She turns around and signals me to keep my voice low, blushes and tells me to wait for a minute so she could wind up her phone conversation with her beloved.

I simply smile. Why did I doubt my intuitions even for a minute! I already know how long this minute is going to last /). I slip into my pyjamas and am off to sleep, praying. I wish their “love” lasts forever (read: F.O.R.E.V.E.R.) :). I earnestly do.
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